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The greatest gift is the
gift of the teachings
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Dharma Talks
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2025-09-03
Love and Refuge in a time of chaos - Q&A 1
17:54
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Ajahn Sucitto
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00:09 Q1 Could you explain again what is meant by the phrase “post-truth world”? 02:15 Q2 - mic was far away, very difficult to hear; seems to be: What advice can you give regarding speech? 11:08 Q3 My dilemma is whether I watch the news or switch it off. It’s so overwhelming. But if I don’t watch it, what am I doing?
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Buddhist Society Summer School
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2025-07-30
Non-Harming: Core Teachings and How to Practice
64:42
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Donald Rothberg
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We begin by remembering the three core methods of training given by the Buddha (wisdom, meditation, and "ethics"), and their interrelationship. We reflect on how ethics has often been marginalized in Western Buddhism (and at times in Asian Buddhism). We then look in depth at the first lay ethical precept, non-harming, first in terms of the core teachings of the Buddha, and its centrality in the earlier Indian traditions of the Vedas. We examine some of the more "outer" dimensions of practicing non-harming, seeing how, with mindfulness and strong intentions, we can bring non-harming into our daily lives, including in our speech and communication. We then look at the more "inner" dimensions of practicing non-harming, looking in particular at how harming ourselves or others typically comes out of our own pain, so that practicing with pain (and the teaching of the Two Arrows) is central. The talk is followed by discussion.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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Monday and Wednesday Talks
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2025-06-14
No Exaggeration
1:23:43
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Nathan Glyde
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A meditation, reflection, and (just the) responses to questions on the theme of wise perception: knowing this is a dependently originating appearance. And expanding wise and skilful (right) speech to include not exaggerating or simplifying! Perhaps these alongside other ideas, will support our practice to deepen, and widen to help liberate peace into the world.
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Gaia House
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Online Dharma Hall - June 2025
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2025-02-12
Cultivating Wise Speech: Its Importance in the Path of Everyday Awakening
63:33
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Donald Rothberg
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Wise speech is an integral part of the traditional Buddhist path of awakening and a powerful way to energize our daily life practice, but is often underdeveloped in Western Buddhist practice. We’ll look in a very practical way at three aspects of wise speech: (1) developing presence in the midst of communication; (2) working with the four guidelines for skillful speech developed by the Buddha; and (3) becoming more mindful of and skillful with thoughts and emotions occurring during communication. For each of the foundations, a number of ways of practicing are offered. The talk is followed by discussion.
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Insight San Diego
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2025-01-09
The Welcome Vihara
46:25
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Ajahn Sucitto
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Basis of healthy human life is goodwill. Our practice is to welcome, to allow and encompass differences. Speech and action based on Dhamma values establishes skilful common ground. We contemplate the effects of deluded reactions and release them - and the citta dwells in a beautiful place and grows beyond self towards measurelessness.
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Cittaviveka
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2024-08-25
A Community Program on Palestine/Israel: Session 3: A Buddhist Toolkit for Skillful Response
1:33:32
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Donald Rothberg,
Ronya Banks
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In the final session of this series, teachers Ronya Banks and Donald Rothberg offer a number of resources that can help one navigate these times and the conflict between Israel and Palestinians. After a brief period of meditation, we offer four teachings and practices, each first explored through teachings and then briefly guided experientially: (1) the teaching of the Two Arrows and Dependent Origination pointing to the nature of reactivity--habitual and often unconscious grasping after the pleasant and pushing away the unpleasant or painful; (2) the teachings about attachment to views; (3) the cultivation of wise speech and empathy, increasingly pointing toward universal empathy and what Dr. King called the "beloved community"; and (4) practicing with difficult emotions, body states (including traumatic reactions), and thoughts. These teachings and practices are followed by a period of discussion, closing intentions, and the dedication of merit.
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Southern Dharma Retreat Center
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A Community Program on Palestine/Israel
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2024-03-16
What Would the Buddha Say? Peaceful Communication Skills for Difficult Times Part 2
55:58
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Ayya Santussika
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Some of the hardest times to come up with the right words and the right attitude are when the topic at hand is really hot. Maybe it is when we feel there is something very important at stake. Maybe it is when something seems very wrong in the world: war, political strife, corruption, injustice. How can we use Right Speech in such circumstances? How can we express ourselves in ways that are truthful but do not widen the divide. How can we promote peace and mutual respect? How can we relate to others with very different views and values with honesty and skill? These are some of the areas we will explore, working with personal as well as societal examples. And, we will base our conversation on the Buddha's words and advice.
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Karuna Buddhist Vihara
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2024-03-16
What Would the Buddha Say? Peaceful Communication Skills for Difficult Times Part 1
1:21:52
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Ayya Santussika
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Some of the hardest times to come up with the right words and the right attitude are when the topic at hand is really hot. Maybe it is when we feel there is something very important at stake. Maybe it is when something seems very wrong in the world: war, political strife, corruption, injustice. How can we use Right Speech in such circumstances? How can we express ourselves in ways that are truthful but do not widen the divide. How can we promote peace and mutual respect? How can we relate to others with very different views and values with honesty and skill? These are some of the areas we will explore, working with personal as well as societal examples. And, we will base our conversation on the Buddha's words and advice.
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Karuna Buddhist Vihara
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2023-11-22
Practicing with Conflict: Foundations 3
66:27
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Donald Rothberg
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We start by reviewing briefly the two times' accounts of the foundations for practicing with differences and conflicts, first giving a definition of "conflict" as a difference of values, goals, or strategies, and not necessarily involving hostility or aggression. There's an invitation to focus on a conflict in one's life that is in the moderate range of difficulty, and bring this to mind as we work with ten foundations of skillful practice with conflict.
We look again briefly at the multiple reasons why bringing our practice to conflicts is often difficult, and then review the more "inner" four foundations of skillful practice with conflict (1-4). We then bring in six further foundations which are more "outer," including (5) developing guidelines and agreements, especially in groups or organizations, but also with individuals; (6) clarifying a vision of a "win-win" or "both-and" approach to conflicts that meet the underlying interests or needs of all concerned; and (7) developing empathy. We offer two brief empathy practices, including one done in the context of one's own conflict. Three further foundations are offered: (8) grounding in Buddhist ethics, particularly the precepts and the understanding that one should bring care and kindness to all, and that all have Buddha Nature; (9) skillful speech (part of ethical training); and (10) the bringing of these ethical dimensions into collective life, through nonviolent action and the concept, in Dr. King's work, of the beloved community. After the talk, there is a discussion.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
:
Monday and Wednesday Talks
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Attached Files:
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Johan Galtung's Win-Win Model of Conflict Transformation
by Donald Rothberg
(PDF)
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Feelings Inventory from NVC
by NVC (added by Donald Rothberg)
(PDF)
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Needs Inventory from NVC
by NVC (added by Donald Rothberg)
(PDF)
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Empathy Map
by Donald Rothberg/Oren Jay Sofer
(PDF)
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2023-10-07
From dukka to liberation (with questions)
45:59
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Ajahn Sucitto
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Questions are précised and read into the file:14:10 Q1 Is there any significance to this figure of speech “there is a cause, it does not lack a cause” or is it just giving emphasis? 15:38 Q2 How do you withdraw emotional energy? 40:56 Q3 Regarding the role of being inspired, I was thinking about the Buddha’s own journey. His movement towards the path was the fourth messenger, the samana who moved him. If he hadn’t been open to that … 43:45 Q4 At some point we want to be skilful and pay attention to those problematic tendencies. So maybe being caught up in that negative script is like getting caught up in judgement. 44:33 Q5 When you can stand back and look at it without being sucked into the vortex. Is that it?
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Bodhi College
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Unpicking the Tangled Skein
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2023-08-16
Cultivating Wise Speech 4: Practicing Wise Speech in Challenging Situations, including with Social and Political Polarization
69:31
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Donald Rothberg
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We begin by acknowledging the importance of Wise Speech practice, and then outline four foundations of Wise Speech that we've explored in previous talks. We then review how we can bring Wise Speech into difficult or challenging situations. The last half of the talk goes further, and explores how we can bring aspects of Wise Speech into situations of social and political polarization, including in our present time in the U.S. (and other countries). We watch two brief videos. The first is a selection from "A Force More Powerful" (a 6-part series on nonviolent action), on a moment of powerful empathic yet firm speech from Diane Nash at a critical moment in the Civil Rights movement in Nashville in 1960 (go to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4dDVeAU3u4&t=3082s, with the video shared going from 43:04 to 48:58). The second is a brief contemporary account of an experience of "deep canvassing" (and deep listening) by Caitlin Homrich-Kneileng in rural Michigan (go to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=no0NzGhwobA). This is followed by discussion.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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Monday and Wednesday Talks
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2023-08-09
Cultivating Wise Speech 3: Review of the Foundations of Wise Speech, and Bringing Wise Speech into Difficult or Challenging Interactions
66:45
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Donald Rothberg
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We first review four foundations of wise speech: (1) developing presence in the midst of communication; (2) working with the four guidelines for skillful speech developed by the Buddha; (3) bringing our mindfulness and skillful responses to our thoughts, emotions, and body states into our speech practice; and (4) empathy practice, tuning into others' and our own emotions and sense of "what matters." We then explore the importance of being with challenges and difficulties in our practice generally, and do two exercises exploring a difficult or challenging interaction with another, including working with an "empathy map." Discussion follows. (Materials on emotions [or feelings], needs, and an "empathy map" are given below, under "documents.")
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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Monday and Wednesday Talks
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Attached Files:
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Feelings Inventory from NVC
by NVC (added by Donald Rothberg)
(PDF)
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Needs Inventory from NVC
by NVC (added by Donald Rothberg)
(PDF)
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Empathy Map
by Donald Rothberg/Oren Jay Sofer
(PDF)
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2023-07-19
Cultivating Wise Speech 2: A Review of Three Foundations of Wise Speech and An Introduction to a Fourth: Empathy Practice
64:50
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Donald Rothberg
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We first focus on the importance of the practice of wise speech and then review three foundations of such practice: (1) developing presence in the midst of communication; (2) working with the four guidelines for skillful speech developed by the Buddha; and (3) integrating our practice to be mindful and skillful with thoughts, emotions, and body states with our speech practice. We then introduce a fourth foundation, empathy practice, aiming to understand and connect with another, exploring the roots of such practice in the innate capacity of empathy. We then identify a simple yet basic practice of tuning into someone's emotions and "needs" (or what matters to someone), based on the work of Nonviolent Communication (developed first by Marshall Rosenberg). A discussion follows, particularly examining bringing these practices into challenging interactions. (Materials on emotions--or feelings, needs, and an "empathy map" are given below, under "documents.")
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
:
Monday and Wednesday Talks
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Attached Files:
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Feelings Inventory from NVC
by NVC (added by Donald Rothberg)
(PDF)
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Needs Inventory from NVC
by NVC (added by Donald Rothberg)
(PDF)
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Empathy Map
by Donald Rothberg/Oren Jay Sofer
(PDF)
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2023-07-12
Cultivating Wise Speech 1
61:26
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Donald Rothberg
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We look first at the importance of wise speech, the way that it forms an integral part of the path of awakening, the way that it is often underdeveloped in Western Buddhist practice, for various reasons, and some of the challenges of speech. We then examine three aspects of wise speech practice: (1) developing presence in the midst of communication; (2) working with the four guidelines for skillful speech developed by the Buddha; and (3) integrating our practice to be mindful and skillful with thoughts, emotions, and body states with our speech practice. The talk is followed by discussion, focused especially on some challenging relational and speech situations.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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Monday and Wednesday Talks
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2022-06-22
Practicing with Polarization, Differences, and Conflict: Six Basic Practices
68:22
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Donald Rothberg
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In the context of increased political polarization in the United States and many other places, we look at how, in so many settings, whether the larger political situation, or social change organizations, or spiritual communities, there is very often a lack of skill in working with differences and conflicts. We examine some of the roots of why being with differences and conflicts is hard, including widespread social conditioning to be either conflict-avoidant or conflict-indulgent, and several other core roots. We then suggest six basic practices which address these roots, including: (1) being willing to open to and explore differences and conflicts, (2) empathy, (3) working with views, (4) working with reactivity and difficult emotions, (5) wise speech, and (6) heart practices. The invitation to listeners is to practice these six (or some of the six) for the next period of time!
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
:
Monday and Wednesday Talks
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2022-01-16
The Five Recollections and the Cultivation of Metta in Daily Life--(Retreat at Spirit Rock)
67:19
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Gullu Singh
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This Dharma Talk reflects on the 5 subjects for frequent recollections (also called the 5 remembrances): (1) I am of the nature to age, I have not gone beyond aging, (2) I am of the nature to sicken, I have not gone beyond sickness, (3) I am of the nature to die, I have not gone beyond dying (4) All that is mine, beloved and pleasing, will become otherwise, Will become separated from me (4) I am the owner of my kamma, heir to my kamma, born of my kamma, related to my kamma, abide supported by my kamma. Whatever kamma I shall do for good or for ill, of that I will be the heir.
This is offered as a chant as a way to connect the teaching to the heart and the body. The talk then explores the liberative idea of Kamma (Karma) where we have more and more agency through the practice to seed our intentions so that our acts of body, speech and mind are more wholesome, skillful, and leading to the alleviation of suffering for ourselves and others.
The talk then explores various strategies for the cultivation of mettā in daily life.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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Metta Retreat: Cultivating the Wise, Awakened, and Responsive Heart
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2021-01-19
Speech from the Heart
36:18
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Kim Allen
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From where does speech originate? How does our speech feed back to affect our own heart (in addition to other people)? These are worthy investigations in Buddhist practice. Speech ties back to the three unwholesome roots of greed, hatred, and delusion, as well as the three wholesome roots of non-greed, non-hatred, and non-delusion. Our choices in this realm have a major impact.
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Insight Meditation South Bay - Silicon Valley
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2020-12-14
Cleaning Citta - New Moon Lunar Observance
51:49
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Ajahn Sucitto
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Purification of mind is not just spiritual jargon but necessary for happiness. No matter how gross or subtle, our speech, mental intentions and bodily actions affect us. Training and cleaning citta involves bringing uplifting qualities to mind and refraining from contracting to the unpleasant. This is how our kamma can begin to change.
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Cittaviveka
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2020-11-21
Q&A
48:00
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Ajahn Sucitto
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Clarification about the fetter “attachment to rites and rituals”; what’s the purpose of life; question about addiction; working with depression; where is the reference to energy in Buddhism; how to get space in intense situations; review of the 4 qualities to promote social harmony – generosity, gentle/harmonious speech, benevolent service, impartiality – DN30:1:16, AN4:32
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Cittaviveka
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At Home with the Homeless: Ajahn Sucitto Locked Down
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2020-10-18
Kathina as the Occasion for Social Harmony
32:39
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Ajahn Sucitto
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This event of Kathina encapsulates the skillful qualities associated with social harmony and cohesion – qualities of generosity and sharing, precepts and virtue, gentle speech and service. Recollecting the goodness of such actions, the heart grows and is strengthened.
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Cittaviveka
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2020-10-07
Deepening Our Practice in the Pandemic 9--Wise Speech 6--Practicing with Difficult Speech Situations 4
49:00
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Donald Rothberg
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We focus, in the context of difficult or challenging communication, on the integration of individual, inner practice and skillful speaking. After a review of eight general guidelines for skillful speech and how we do inner practice related to, but separate from, such challenging communication, we look at ways to bring inner practice in speaking and relating. We also focus on several more "outer" skillful ways of speaking to bring about mutual understanding, including using relatively neutral observations free of interpretations, and cultivating the practice of empathy. We then look at how to integrate more inner and more outer dimensions of practice in the context of several challenging situations.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
:
Monday and Wednesday Talks
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2020-09-23
Deepening Our Practice in the Pandemic 7: The Foundations of Wise Speech 4: Becoming More Skillful with Difficult Speech Situations 2
1:10:06
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Donald Rothberg
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After a brief review of the foundations of wise speech and the eight guidelines for skillful speech when there are difficult or challenging situations, we explore the connection of inner practices with such situations. We look at two dimensions of such practice: (1) looking at and transforming conditioning that makes it hard to engage in such situations, such as related to negative views about conflict and anger, and discerning when there is spiritual bypassing in relationship to difficulties; and (2) bringing mindfulness, inquiry, and investigation to difficult emotions such as anger, fear, sadness, etc.,and to thoughts and narratives (especially generated by the judgmental mind). We will continue this exploration, including of difficult body states, next time..
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
:
Monday and Wednesday Talks
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2020-08-21
In the Stream of the Noble Ones
32:00
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Ayya Medhanandi
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Think of yourself as a spiritual warrior. What is the danger at hand? What is our true protection? Where is safety? Be ever aware. Staying close to the Dhamma, we will inevitably grow close to the Buddha. We shall uphold virtue foremost through wholesome friendships, purify intention, action, and speech, at rest or work or during mental cultivation, and embody the noble wisdom and compassion of the Buddha by setting our feet in his very footprints.
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Satipanna Insight Meditation (SIMT)
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Chapin Mill Retreat
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2020-08-19
The Inner Stopping
26:54
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Ayya Medhanandi
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Wherever we go the mind does not remain happy - unless we fully awaken. How can we end the restless tides and remain inwardly stable, content within ourselves like the well-hewn wheel that stood still when it stopped rolling and did not fall down? Purifying our bodily acts, speech, and mind in the Buddha's gradual training, we go beyond the eight worldly winds, coming to cessation, to the Deathless.
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Satipanna Insight Meditation (SIMT)
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Chapin Mill Retreat
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2020-08-19
Deepening Our Practice in the Pandemic 4: The Foundations of Wise Speech 1: Cultivating Empathy
66:30
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Donald Rothberg
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We start with a brief review of the three previous talks on deepening practice during the pandemic (and other crises), including clarifying three broad areas of practice: Formal meditation practice, daily life practice, and work, service, and/or activism as practice. In this session, we explore the foundations of Wise Speech as practice, mentioning three foundations. The first two include (1) the ethical guidelines given by the Buddha regarding skillful speech, and (2) developing presence and mindfulness during speech (including listening). We focus most of the time on the third foundation of cultivating empathic connection with another, clarifying the difference between empathy and compassion, giving some of the findings of studies in neuroscience about empathy, and examining what blocks empathy. We then work with a simple (yet powerful) empathy practice of tuning into (1) emotions, and (2) what matters, and move into a period of discussion.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
:
Monday and Wednesday Talks
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2020-05-24
The Quail's Tale: A Path to Harmlessness
41:38
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Ayya Medhanandi
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Praising Truth for its own sake, we lean in the direction of Truth. We make our intention not to harm by body, speech, or thought. Harmlessness leads to selflessness. Selflessness leads to the Deathless. To boundless compassion. It will save us from the flames of greed, violence, and delusion raging around us. Like the baby quail. What saved it from the forest fire was the purity of its own truth developed over lifetimes. A talk given in a Toronto Theravada Buddhist Community (TBC) zoom during the COVID-19 pandemic.
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Toronto Theravada Buddhist Community (TBC)
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2019-10-12
Integrity Leads to Awakening
54:22
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Ajahn Sucitto
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With reference to AN10:61, this teaching reviews the nutriments that result in ignorance, and the nutriments that result in true knowledge and liberation. For the latter, it starts with a person of integrity, with kalyanamitta. We all model something to each other. Cultivating purity of mind, thought, intention, speech, action is then not only for our welfare, but for the welfare of others.
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Cittaviveka
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Vassa 2019 Closing Group Practice Retreat, Cittaviveka Monastery
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2019-05-01
From the Ordinary Habitual Mind to the Buddha-Mind 4: Practicing with the Body 2
66:25
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Donald Rothberg
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We contextualize our conditioning in relationship to the different “parts” of our experience—related to our thinking, emotions, and body—by examining some the social and cultural history of the last few hundred years, in which thinking has been increasingly differentiated from emotions and the body. We then examine further the nature of our ordinary, habitual experience of the body. The main focus is on a number of “body practices,” including mindfulness of the body in both formal meditation and daily life, ways to self-regulate when there is high activation, using the body in investigation of experience, and the body as a key to presence in speech and interaction.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
:
Monday and Wednesday Talks
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2019-04-18
Life Saving Sanctuary
25:31
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Ayya Medhanandi
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Our spiritual home is within the heart. Are we able to activate that awareness, and to treasure kindness and goodness in our daily actions and speech? Can wholesome states of mind prevail even when we face difficult or painful conditions? Moral purity is the harbinger for our waking up to the Truth within us. As we hasten to empty and weed out self-centredness, the poison arrow of craving is extracted. This is freedom – this is life-saving sanctuary.
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Insight Meditation Society - Retreat Center
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The Heart of Wisdom: Monastic Retreat
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2019-03-19
Freely Engaging
55:35
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Martin Aylward
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These talks build on one another and work well as a series. Building on and referring to the previous talks on the retreat, these reflexions serve as an invitation to reflect on our engagement with the world. Reflections draw on a full and free engagement with thought, speech and action for showing up amidst the turbulence and uncertainty of the world we live in.
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Gaia House
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Freeness and Friction: How We Meet Ourselves and the World
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2019-01-11
The Art of Mindful Communication: Right Speech in a Post-Truth World
66:12
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Oren Jay Sofer
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Mindfulness practice provides a powerful support for clear, kind, and effective conversations. Join author and meditation teacher Oren Jay Sofer for this exploration of how our contemplative practice provides a foundation for bringing more compassion, clarity, and connection into our speech and relationships. In these polarized times, how can we speak and listen in a way that is aligned with our values? How can we hear others with divergent views?
Oren will be offering teachings from his new book, Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication.
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New York Insight Meditation Center
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NYI Regular Talks
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2019-01-11
The Art of Mindful Communication: guided meditation
40:20
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Oren Jay Sofer
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Mindfulness practice provides a powerful support for clear, kind, and effective conversations. Join author and meditation teacher Oren Jay Sofer for this exploration of how our contemplative practice provides a foundation for bringing more compassion, clarity, and connection into our speech and relationships. In these polarized times, how can we speak and listen in a way that is aligned with our values? How can we hear others with divergent views?
Oren will be offering teachings from his new book, Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication.
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New York Insight Meditation Center
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NYI Regular Talks
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2018-10-24
Cultivating Wise Speech 2
2:06:45
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Donald Rothberg
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Description:We review first why speech practice is so important and how it connects with the Noble Eightfold Path, and then two of the foundations of skillful or wise (or right) speech. We cover: (1) working with the four guidelines from the Buddha for wise speech, and how we can use the guidelines both to guide our speech and as spurs for mindfulness, when we find ourselves going against the guidelines; and (2) developing a sense of presence during speaking and listening. We then explore some general ways to strengthen our speech practice, as well as begin to bring it into challenging or difficult situations involving speech and interaction. We end with a speech exercise involving dyads, and discussion of the exercise and our practice generally.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
:
Monday and Wednesday Talks
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2018-10-17
Cultivating Wise Speech 1
64:49
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Donald Rothberg
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We start with an overview of the contemporary importance of training in wise speech, and the place of wise (or "right") speech traditionally, as one of the factors of the Noble Eightfold Path of the Buddha. We then examine two foundational aspects of wise speech, first a grounding in the ethical guidelines for speech given by the Buddha, and secondly the intention to be present and mindful during speaking and listening. Finally, there is a guided practice in dyads especially of the second foundational dimension of speech practice.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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2018-08-01
Six Ways of Practicing with Difficulties and Challenges
64:45
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Donald Rothberg
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One of the glories of our practice is the capacity to respond skillfully, with wisdom and compassion, to difficult, challenging, and/or painful experiences. In this talk and discussion, we explore six ways to practice skillfully with difficulties, focusing more in 1-5 on “inner" practices: (1) Stay connected with core teachings and perspectives, particularly about working with reactivity; (2) develop mindfulness in these situations, which helps us with non-reactivity and knowing what is happening; (3) have a few ways to come back to balance and non-reactivity after one is reactive, lost, stuck, or overwhelmed; (4) take the difficult situation as an opportunity to go more deeply, potentially uprooting some of the roots of reactivity and habitual tendencies; (5) continue to cultivate awakened qualities, helping us to shift our center of gravity from reactivity to responsiveness; and (6) cultivate ways of responding more skillfully in “outer” ways, including speech and interactions.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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